It is true that gamblers change their mindset after winning in gambling, because they forget the past and later they have a desire to win more. If there is a role for giving money in gambling, then after winning, the gambler changes his mindset and later forgets to keep this promise. He fails to follow this incident in turn, but some gamblers do such a disrespect.
However, in my life, I lent money to a friend while gambling, later that gambler faced losses while gambling. Today, it has been more than two years and he has not paid me back, and since then I have not given him any more loans. The gambler forgets the promise he makes at the beginning while gambling, and later he does not keep it.
Topic: Mentality of Gamblers Before and After Winning - page 4. (Read 1639 times)
I get upset when I lose money, even though I don't gamble everyday, sometimes I got pissed and abandon gambling for weeks and when the thirsty comes back I will try again, the difference is I need to miss gambling for me to feel like gambling, I am glad I don't gamble like my life depends on it, when winning comes you feel on top of the world easily and when losses comes you feel stupid, I guess these feelings are normal, we are human not some robot.
Your feelings are natural, like many of us. There is nothing surprising here. It is quite natural to feel joy when you win and disappointment when you lose money. Just like you, I now play only when I really need to, to get away from everyday worries. To escape into the world of excitement and adrenaline. You just can’t do without it. A person must have leisure time so as not to burn out mentally and physically. 
First off, why did he agree to give you 10% of the earnings? Did you help him place any of his bets or was it because he just didn't want you to feel left out.? At the end of the day your very friendship might be riding on this $140 that you now feel entitled to because of his half promise and unwillingness to pay.
It's normal in male friendship, you don't have to help anything, but they will give promise if x then I will do y. Hence, we have heard so many women saying men only give promise, but zero action. This one is the example, @OP's friend promise to give 10% of the profit, but he didn't do it.Yes, it can be concluded that his friend forgot him when he was on top and remembered his friend again when he was down, yes, OP should be grateful because with this he no longer needs to respond to his friend in any situation, he also has to act indifferent to his friend so that his friend also realizes his mistake.
For me, friends play a very important role in my life if something happens, one day I will definitely need their help, so as much as possible not to break off friendship just because of money.
The reality is high class people tend to not help low class people and low class people tend to help other people. If you care with "friendship" you're high unlikely be rich since you value friendship over money, rich people don't have friends, but they have colleagues, acquaintances, schoolmates, clients. For me, friends play a very important role in my life if something happens, one day I will definitely need their help, so as much as possible not to break off friendship just because of money.
I have shared with the community before how I stopped gambling and am currently healing from that addiction. However, recently I had an interesting experience with a friend who was just getting started with sports betting (football). He placed small bets on several football matches, and to his excitement he won 10 out of 11 in a combined bet. He was excited and waiting the final match, knowing it would bring him a huge gain. I supported him telling him he would win and he even promised to give me 10% of his earnings if he won that combined bet with around @1400 odds in total.
The match ended with a win and we were both happy. Personally, I wasn't concerned about receiving any money from him as I was more focused on my recovery to not set a bet or deposit ever again. However, the next day my friend avoided me and didn't follow through on his promise even though I wouldn’t have minded if he didn’t.
What I took away from this experience is how the mentality of gamblers can change after a win. The thrill of success often leaves us wanting more and in this case it seemed like my friend was caught in that cycle, as I was feeling before too and he was unable to honor his word probably because he wanted to keep increasing his gains and bet more. It's a reminder that the brain is never truly satisfied when gambling, there's always the desire for more. I believe that friend deserves an advice, but I don’t want to embarrass him myself, is there a good way to talk to him without making him feel that Im indirectly asking him for the money he promised me?
The match ended with a win and we were both happy. Personally, I wasn't concerned about receiving any money from him as I was more focused on my recovery to not set a bet or deposit ever again. However, the next day my friend avoided me and didn't follow through on his promise even though I wouldn’t have minded if he didn’t.
What I took away from this experience is how the mentality of gamblers can change after a win. The thrill of success often leaves us wanting more and in this case it seemed like my friend was caught in that cycle, as I was feeling before too and he was unable to honor his word probably because he wanted to keep increasing his gains and bet more. It's a reminder that the brain is never truly satisfied when gambling, there's always the desire for more. I believe that friend deserves an advice, but I don’t want to embarrass him myself, is there a good way to talk to him without making him feel that Im indirectly asking him for the money he promised me?
First off, why did he agree to give you 10% of the earnings? Did you help him place any of his bets or was it because he just didn't want you to feel left out.? At the end of the day your very friendship might be riding on this $140 that you now feel entitled to because of his half promise and unwillingness to pay. He may regret agreeing to pay this money after having won, your best case is to go to him and congratulate him on his win and tell him to not worry about the money. If what you say is true and you are trying to get off of a gambling addiction then you should have no business getting into sports betting right now lest you want to get back in the same hole you just dug yourself out of.
There is nothing you need to do to talk to him just keep quiet and see if he will keep his promise and it should go without saying, if he has the mind and considers you as his friend he will give what has been promised before.
From the way OP narrated his friends action I don't think his friend would even regard him even if he gives him sometime because if he was a man of integrity he would have done what he promised, perhaps in other way round I think the OP should even be grateful that it happen that way because from that event he has been able to no the true nature of the person he called a friend, however in most cases how all this things normally end is when his friend will lavish all the money he has won that's when he would remember he had a friend, so I actually like the OP response to him because on this case silence is the best. For me, friends play a very important role in my life if something happens, one day I will definitely need their help, so as much as possible not to break off friendship just because of money.
It's not just gambling alone; what you said is true. When someone is excited, they can make huge promises to anyone. In this life, we should just learn not to put interest in the promises of someone if not we will get disappointed. What you can do is not say a word to him about the money, just let everything be and be his friend as usual.
If your friend had lost in his bet. You will notice he would stick to you for you to show compassion for him. Funny enough money won in gambling does not last forever, he will spend it all someday and then come back to you.
That's human for you, sometimes we can say things because of excitement and later act as if we never made any promises. There is no need to even talk about because the money belongs to him and he will make decision whether to give or not. I know this might look difficult for those who expect so much in cases like this when someone close offer to give a share out from their money, but if they have the understanding of how humans can easily change I believe it won't be a matter that needs to bother one. It is better to just move on just as if he never won the money because had it been he didn't win the game you their won't be any expectation from him.If your friend had lost in his bet. You will notice he would stick to you for you to show compassion for him. Funny enough money won in gambling does not last forever, he will spend it all someday and then come back to you.
It's best not to pay too much attention to him, because when he loses everything he will look for you, and that's the moment for you to advise your friend, forcing him to talk to him will only cause you heartache.
It's not just gambling alone; what you said is true. When someone is excited, they can make huge promises to anyone. In this life, we should just learn not to put interest in the promises of someone if not we will get disappointed. What you can do is not say a word to him about the money, just let everything be and be his friend as usual.
If your friend had lost in his bet. You will notice he would stick to you for you to show compassion for him. Funny enough money won in gambling does not last forever, he will spend it all someday and then come back to you.
That's human for you, sometimes we can say things because of excitement and later act as if we never made any promises. There is no need to even talk about because the money belongs to him and he will make decision whether to give or not. I know this might look difficult for those who expect so much in cases like this when someone close offer to give a share out from their money, but if they have the understanding of how humans can easily change I believe it won't be a matter that needs to bother one. It is better to just move on just as if he never won the money because had it been he didn't win the game you their won't be any expectation from him. If your friend had lost in his bet. You will notice he would stick to you for you to show compassion for him. Funny enough money won in gambling does not last forever, he will spend it all someday and then come back to you.
Money is an amplifier of character, if you are the greedy type it would show easily when you have money... it's a shame that you got nothing of the win but this should be a lesson to you, do o not trust anyone when it comes to money related issues, and you are not entitled to anyone's wealth, no one really owes you anything. Gambling can be very exciting when you start winning at first but with time you would know that it's not always going to be Rossy. If you know anyone that got a huge win on their first trial advice them not to go back into it.
Lolz. Money is the root of all evil and money changes and rebuild and remodel someone's character. Money can destroy friendship and reunite them again. Money is the changer of character. And Op friend character was remodel with the gambling win and immediately he he forgot his friend. And after when he has finished spending them then he will remember that, he had a friend in the gambling hall. But what he did was bad but Op you have to move on. And one day your God giving us coming and you will hit more than what your friend win. Old soldier never dies. I believe you are still visiting the casinos one a month. Even as you said you are trying to forget gambling but old soldier never dies. 
Money is an amplifier of character, if you are the greedy type it would show easily when you have money... it's a shame that you got nothing of the win but this should be a lesson to you, do o not trust anyone when it comes to money related issues, and you are not entitled to anyone's wealth, no one really owes you anything. Gambling can be very exciting when you start winning at first but with time you would know that it's not always going to be Rossy. If you know anyone that got a huge win on their first trial advice them not to go back into it.
Once people ran for food. Now the scenario has changed, and people aren't satisfied. Everyone needs more and more, and your friend isn't an exception. Initially he is in a dilemma about whether the bet will be won or not. By the time he promised to give a few percentage of the winnings, and once the bet is won, he himself felt greed and want to win more money. Gambling is risky, as it is kind of a cyclic process. Today the friend has won big, and tomorrow we don't know how things are going to change.
Money is an amplifier of character, if you are the greedy type it would show easily when you have money... it's a shame that you got nothing of the win but this should be a lesson to you, do o not trust anyone when it comes to money related issues, and you are not entitled to anyone's wealth, no one really owes you anything. Gambling can be very exciting when you start winning at first but with time you would know that it's not always going to be Rossy. If you know anyone that got a huge win on their first trial advice them not to go back into it.
Once people ran for food. Now the scenario has changed, and people aren't satisfied. Everyone needs more and more, and your friend isn't an exception. Initially he is in a dilemma about whether the bet will be won or not. By the time he promised to give a few percentage of the winnings, and once the bet is won, he himself felt greed and want to win more money. Gambling is risky, as it is kind of a cyclic process. Today the friend has won big, and tomorrow we don't know how things are going to change. 
Money is an amplifier of character, if you are the greedy type it would show easily when you have money... it's a shame that you got nothing of the win but this should be a lesson to you, do o not trust anyone when it comes to money related issues, and you are not entitled to anyone's wealth, no one really owes you anything. Gambling can be very exciting when you start winning at first but with time you would know that it's not always going to be Rossy. If you know anyone that got a huge win on their first trial advice them not to go back into it.
But, gambling does not always target big wins because at least, over time they will have their own way to enjoy gambling. Indeed, at first they will be very happy when they get the biggest win from whatever profit they get, and even though they will continue to gamble I think it will not be a problem as long as they can control their emotions. But at least, it will be bad when they experience defeat andthen ask for a loan just to gamble, because it will make it very bad when gambling with borrowed money like that. But the point is, as long as they have good control over themselves, then gambling will remain safe.
Money is an amplifier of character, if you are the greedy type it would show easily when you have money... it's a shame that you got nothing of the win but this should be a lesson to you, do o not trust anyone when it comes to money related issues, and you are not entitled to anyone's wealth, no one really owes you anything. Gambling can be very exciting when you start winning at first but with time you would know that it's not always going to be Rossy. If you know anyone that got a huge win on their first trial advice them not to go back into it.
There is nothing you need to do to talk to him just keep quiet and see if he will keep his promise and it should go without saying, if he has the mind and considers you as his friend he will give what has been promised before.
From the way OP narrated his friends action I don't think his friend would even regard him even if he gives him sometime because if he was a man of integrity he would have done what he promised, perhaps in other way round I think the OP should even be grateful that it happen that way because from that event he has been able to no the true nature of the person he called a friend, however in most cases how all this things normally end is when his friend will lavish all the money he has won that's when he would remember he had a friend, so I actually like the OP response to him because on this case silence is the best. 
I get upset when I lose money, even though I don't gamble everyday, sometimes I got pissed and abandon gambling for weeks and when the thirsty comes back I will try again, the difference is I need to miss gambling for me to feel like gambling, I am glad I don't gamble like my life depends on it, when winning comes you feel on top of the world easily and when losses comes you feel stupid, I guess these feelings are normal, we are human not some robot.
This is natural. No matter how good a gambler is in gambling, there will be losses. Along with losses, there will also be some winnings and during this time, the mentality of the gambler can be seen changing. In winnings, gamblers are so generous that they will never lose, and when they lose, it seems that it is not possible for them to win. When a gambler can control himself in this situation, he is a responsible gambler. I have seen several friends who are so confident after a win that they will not lose again, they also misuse money at that time, but when they lose, they realize their mistakes. In betting, everyone's mentality changes drastically after winning and after losing. Not every person can accept defeat easily, which is why they will be upset, it is natural since everyone is human. Controlling oneself in any situation is important in gambling. I get upset when I lose money, even though I don't gamble everyday, sometimes I got pissed and abandon gambling for weeks and when the thirsty comes back I will try again, the difference is I need to miss gambling for me to feel like gambling, I am glad I don't gamble like my life depends on it, when winning comes you feel on top of the world easily and when losses comes you feel stupid, I guess these feelings are normal, we are human not some robot.
It seems you know how to treats gambling with right because you can leave gambling for weeks. This is what we must do so we don't gets deeper in gambling and not think that gambling is our main activity.Yes, when we are winning, we will feel better and think that we can win more than we did before. That will make us lose the win money without we can hold ourselves and stop gambling. Gambling can easily make you forget about controlling yourself so you will only want to keep gambling.
It's a reminder that the brain is never truly satisfied when gambling, there's always the desire for more.
And not only while gambling can such scenario be reference with, because it is human's nature to have an insatiable needs (i.e according to economics), whereby the more we get, the more we want to get more, which is obviously what happened in this scenario with you and your friend.Quote
I believe that friend deserves an advice, but I don’t want to embarrass him myself,
I literally don't think he deserves any advice, apart from the aspect of letting him how it's totally wrong to make promises and failed to fulfill it. Just as he told O.P he will be giving him 10% if he wins, and he won and never fulfilled his promises.Quote
is there a good way to talk to him without making him feel that Im indirectly asking him for the money he promised me?
If I was to be you, the best I could do is "Let Go", and act as if nothing ever happened, because for the fact that he promised and failed to fulfill his promises and not trying to afford me due to guilty conscience, the best I could do will be to behave as if nothing ever happened, and then be fully conscious whenever I'm around him, knowing fully well he can never be trusted with monetary agreement. 
When I read the OP's story I was wondering how old he is but then I remembered from other threads that he is 21 if I remember correctly. I say that because in older people it doesn't usually happen. I'm not saying it's impossible but it's more typical of younger people a story like that. Apart from what he promised to give him 10% of the winnings, the friend is going to get a reality check. To win 11 out of 11 in a combined bet is a very improbable event even if you are an expert sports bettor with long term winnings. The difference is that these, the profitable bettors, the professionals, know that it is an improbable event and get their money from a total profitability of all bets.
It looks like this guy is going to spend lots and lots of money trying to reach the rush feeling he achieved when he won the 11 out of 11 combined bets.
It looks like this guy is going to spend lots and lots of money trying to reach the rush feeling he achieved when he won the 11 out of 11 combined bets.
This happens in many cases like i consoled my friend when i lost a big bet and my friend also lost. It's really sympathetic because losing money changes everyone mindset. We should understand that the fun money won in gambling does not last forever because he will spend it all one day and then come back to you. The day your friend wins big money he will be very happy and he will run to different places to enjoy his happiness. Gamblers are at the peak of excitement, maybe he has won a few bets, or he has lost again.
It's normal for an active gambler to lose often because that is what gambling is designed for but we still can get some benefits at them like we still enjoyed our session firstly before experiencing a sad feeling, only because we lost all of our money at the end. It is great if you don't solo your pain. It can help you alleviate it and recover faster than usual. It is only sad to know if both you and your friends lost together because there are times that our luck is not the same as the others.We might lose today but the people around us still wins, or vice versa. Losing money is truly devastating because most of us work hard for it for a long time only to obtain it and now we lost them in gambling very quickly. Losing has to do with our emotion and there might only be two types of emotion, and that is; one is sad, and the other is happy.
When we lose we can experience the sad emotion, but if we win, it was the happy one. Fun money in gambling is like a play money. You can't withdraw it but if you are talking about the real money, it would still depend on the gambler. Some are responsible enough to make use of the money very well and this money can last a long time for them, especially if the win is huge. Unfortunately for some, that is not the case that happens.
I get upset when I lose money, even though I don't gamble everyday, sometimes I got pissed and abandon gambling for weeks and when the thirsty comes back I will try again, the difference is I need to miss gambling for me to feel like gambling, I am glad I don't gamble like my life depends on it, when winning comes you feel on top of the world easily and when losses comes you feel stupid, I guess these feelings are normal, we are human not some robot.
I think that's the best strategy we can come up with. To take the rest without gambling at all. A day off will be fine, it will help us refresh our brain and maybe take out the strain of stress especially if we all think about is gambling every minute of our day. I mean, that's not good for our mental health. I am glad there are people who think that way, they need to miss gambling first before they will come back and I do believe that's one of the recipes for gambling to be more fun and entertaining. An everyday routine of gambling is not a good choice because we all know that the house will always win and even if we come up with the best strategy, we will still lose because there's really no such thing as that.
Jump to: